From the woman who gave us “Te Amo” – basically lots of lesbon action without the actual ‘action’ but we can guess it would have involved scuzzy fingers and lots of things that vibrate – and no we don’t mean Lionel Richie’s dentures when he’s on that ceiling. Captions from you funny people for this dirty ole’ pic of RiRi and her mic come c*ck. Thanking you kindly.  Read More →

As if Big Will, Jada and karate-kid Jaden weren’t enough, now Willow, the 9-year-old daughter of Will Smith is about to release her debut single titled “Whip My Hair”. Channelling RiRi in muzak and style, Willow gets her steez on in this club-track which sees her encourage gals to snap their heads back and forth and whip that hair like a helicopter. *cue ‘tude, snapping those fingers and uh-huh sista”. There’s... 

Demi Moore’s Twitpic of herself in a leopard print bikini spread like wildfire over the interweb last week – and prompted other slebs to parody the pic. But here’s one we didn’t laugh at…in fact it makes us feel nauseas. Perez Hilton in his kecks. Oh purleasssssseee, put it away love. We’ve seen more meat in a builders lunchbox…and on that note, did you fall off the ole’ diet wagon again?  Read More →

I got accosted by a religious fruitcake (is there any other kind?) last night. There I was, minding my own, chomping on a Chocolate Hazelnut Crunch Atkins Advantage bar (19 whole grams of protein. I want tits like Cindy Crawford’s), when a small kind of person edged towards me, from the right. He had blond hair, blue eyes and colour in his cheeks. So far, so not the crazy religiouses I’m used to. ‘Hello,’ he said. ‘Are you from round here?’ There... 

Those of you who shun Her Majesty’s public transport don’t know what you’re missing. Especially buses. I tend to skip Bendies mostly because there always seems to be a smell of burning on them (or maybe I’m always having a stroke) and the concertina bit in the middle may be an engineering marvel but it ain’t no big shakes, so it’s Double Ds all the way. My little red number’s the 55, or ‘Jeremy Kyle on Wheels’, and I hand-on-heart... 

Otherwise known as, “dirtay old sl*g”. The actress, who recently split from rugby hunk, Danny Cipriani after two years – thinks she’s like Charlotte from ‘Sex and the City’, but wants to be a wild-cat like Samantha instead and f**k loads of guys. Yah, because that will really make everyone respect you and think you’re actually talented. Never gonna happen. Brook said: “Right now I’m all about having a good time.... 

You know you’re cool when your Grandma officially digs your latest crush – so Eminem better get on with it and tell RiRi he’s a in love-dom with her. Betty Kresin (that’s the rapper’s Gran, yo) told Heatworld.com that Eminem would be a catch for any woman, including the singer he collaborated on for ‘Love the way you lie’. Kresin said: “I can totally see what any girl would see in in him. He’s... 

Like a comedian who cringes when his audience stare blankly at his supposedly funny delivery – Lily Allen proves that she’s not only a crapola entertainer but shouldn’t really bother with attempts at “comedy”. The singer reportedly made a quip about the Gaga being a hermaphrodite, during her Big Chill set in front of 30,000 people at the weekend, saying: “Somebody threw this potato at me. It says, ‘Show... 

Mitch Winohouse (Papa to Amy Wino), has cancelled his UK tour after being taken ill whilst on holiday in Spain-land. A Landaaaan cabbie by day – and jazz singer by night – he was due to kick off his tour, performing in Edinburgh last night (09.08.10) but is currently still in hospital. A spokesperson for Winohouse said: “It appears to be food poisoning or gastroenteritis. His manager is now on his way to see him in hospital.” So... 

Oooh meow…bestie pals? Not much! Nasty Nadine Coyle allegedly failed to invite her Girls Aloud bandmate Chezza/Cole/Tweedy/Aloud to a bbq at her house in LA, despite the pair both being in the US city. Chezza is currently in LA, mostly shopping and being followed around by sleb hungry gayface, Derek the dancer, while Coyle continues to work on her debut solo album. However, a source close to the pair says they’re not avoiding each other...